It’s finally Fall, and Fall clothing and fashion is SO FUN.
Clothes greatly impact our relationship with our bodies. One way that I love my body is by reframing how I talk about clothes. Rather than using clothing as a measurement of if my body is ‘too big’ or ‘too small’ or wrong in any way,
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As a recovering chronic people pleaser... saying “No” has been a very important lesson for me...
Part of enjoying life more is making peace with what is. Is the present moment perfect? It depends on your definition of perfect...
Confession: I have a happy rock. I go to sleep holding it almost every night. I promise there's a reason why.
How Carrying Extra Weight is a Brilliant Defense. Can fat serve as a subconscious protective barrier?
When we know our bodies aren’t as healthy, vivacious, or as alive as we want, and when that looks like excess fat cells, inflammation, or water retention there is a subconscious story possibly at play. Becoming aware of this story can give you some more compassion for yourself, for your body, and for why you can’t seem to feel totally healthy right now. The Story: At one point in many women’s* lives they were radiant, open, embodied, and comfortable. Then they experienced something that made them feel unsafe. Often this comes in the form of unwanted sexual attention. I give unwanted sexual attention a very broad definition to include sexual assault, unwanted touch, subtle looks, remarks, or any moment that you feel unsafe in your body. All the times it didn’t feel safe to say "no", or when your "no" wasn’t honored, impact your feeling of safety greatly. Look for my future blog about "Where's your "No" at?" to hear more about the importance of "no", and how we can reclaim it. *see footnote Seeing myself in the mirror used to be a big trigger point, a time when I would scrutinize my body and check in on all the parts that were wrong, that I needed to fix, that I rejected.
All the work I’ve done culminated in an exquisite moment over the summer. I had just showered, and as I took off my towel to hang it up to dry I saw myself, naked, in the full length mirror. The way I felt as I looked at my reflection was a revelation! Overcome with this feeling of joy, of enthusiasm, I looked at my body and felt such admiration. I looked at my face in the mirror and smiled. My eyes were sparkling. I said, "Oh my goodness! You are so beautiful!" I laughed. I felt like I was glowing. Like the body I saw before me was powerful beyond measure. Like every inch was a masterpiece. The “flaws” I usually saw before were there, but they were no longer flaws, now they were treasures. Safety is the basis for every human action.
I want to introduce you to the aspects of safety you maybe haven't thought of before, and show you how it is the basis for everything we do and feel. Definition of Safety: freedom from harm or danger: the state of being safe
How do you feel when you feel safe? On a physical, emotional, mental, and spiritual level? I feel it like an expansion. Like there's a lot of space. It's easy to breathe, easy to smile. My posture is relaxed, I really receive all the beautiful things around me: the soft breeze, the variety of colors and textures I can see, the smells, the sounds. It all feels easy and I can see the goodness in things. Contrastingly, how do you feel when you feel unsafe? What's different? I swore I'd never diet, I'd never be fat, never dislike my body, never struggle with what I saw my mom struggle with.
And maybe it's because I swore I'd never do any of that that I somehow made it my own problem. Luckily, I found a way out. This blog is for you if you, too, want to find a way to lift the heaviness of not feeling at home in your body. A reassuring note: for my work, it’s necessary to go to the deep, sticky, painful places, but I always come back up to the light and warmth. If you're already triggered: take a deep breath. In... and out... It's ok to feel uncomfortable. Bravery and willingness are essential, and it's ok if you're not ready to go there. Come back when you are ready. A day in my life: Sometimes I wake up and feel like a goddess. Like frickin' Beyonce on the set of some bad ass music video. I flip my hair, and do a dance in the mirror, I walk with the proud chest of a lioness (or something else majestic) as I go get my cup of tea, and I feel invincible. Like everything is just working out for me. And then, something happens... |
Author:Makayla McDonald is a Body Image Coach who lives in Boulder, Colorado. She is passionate about connecting to freedom and peace for herself and for all of her community! Archives
October 2016
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